Thursday, June 19, 2008

Boats

For the past week a woman with three young children has been coming into the cafe.
The youngest is seven months, the next is 3 yrs and then 6 yrs. The children are beautiful.
They are being raised by a rare tribe; the homeless. It's not unusual for one of the children to walk up to a rough looking man and crawl into his lap or eat someone else's snack.
Everyone sleeps together outside on a covered porch so the children are pretty familiar with
their surroundings and the people at the cafe.
It makes me smile to see a three year old little boy walk up to a dirty tattooed old man and crawl right up into his lap. Who can resist little boy giggles and hugs?
Having the children at the cafe brings a different side of life to us. Most of the people have lost their children to the state or have given up their parental rights because of addictions or poor choices. They love having the kids around, it's good for them.
I'm not sure how good it is for the kids.
Today I got inspired to colour with the babies so we found some markers and set out to
drawing boats. The three year old little boy looked at me with his big brown eyes and said "One day I gunna have a boat". Then he put a blue marker in his mouth and sucked the ink out of it, leaving him with a blue teeth to accompany his adorable smile.
I hope he does have a boat one day, but what are the odds of that?
I struggle between wanting to keep families together and wanting a safe, stable environment for children.
One thing is for certain, in the homeless community when the focus is taken off the drama at hand ( and there is TONS!) and affection and love and attention is placed on something else, the community is changed.
We all need something to live for. We all need something to belong to, a war to fight and people to love.
You cannot live life well if you have nothing to live for.
I hope the people in this community can find something to live for.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

The Secret to Making Bread

Today was an interesting day.
The first day I arrived at the cafe I noticed a well groomed man with salt and pepper hair, more salt than pepper if you know what i mean. He is tall which is strange because most of us at the shelter are on the shorter side. He is well mannered and kind and seems out of place at the cafe. I think that is why he first caught my attention.
Today I got to hear all about his life. Tall S n' P guy is now George from Detroit. He was a cook in the merchant marines for most of his adult life and he has traveled all over the world.
A few years ago he had a stroke and lost his job . He was in the hospital for a month and then he went to rehab for another month. After he got out he was out of a job.
I asked him how long had he been homeless and he said for about two months. " I've never been homeless before" he told me. " It's scary".
George is a kind soul. He is one of those people you spot out in a crowd. You know he would talk to you on the bus. If you were an old lady he would carry your groceries home for you.
George asked me all about my life too. During out 10 minute devotions at 9:30 every morning he is always present and at attention.
We have had three classes so far this week and today was his second time to come. " It fascinates me, everything Cory ( my boss...) talks about. He doesn't talk about Jesus like I have heard all these years". George has my attention now. I ask him to tell me more about that. " I have been searching for a while now. I almost converted to Buddhism because it made sense to me." George is definitely in the right place to be searching.
During our class this afternoon he took notes and listened wide eyed and anxious for the next word. This is the stuff right here.
The rest of the day followed as usual. John and his Amen's and Yes Lords echoed through the room ( It's a bit more echo-y since the remodel, we have tile instead of carpet!). Boundaries are always being pushed and its a struggle to maintain the appropriate amount of distance.
Then there is the being hit on ( why do I only get asked out at the homeless shelter...), the occasional profanity, the regulars, including Bob and his room mate Ron. Ron comes every day with a smile. He has one tooth and is balding with a pony tail. And then there are the new comers who always ask for two snacks when we can always only give them one.
We have added a new element to our routine! Because of our new tile floor we no longer have to worry about spilling coffee on the carpet, but this produces coffee stains on blue tile. We have taken to throwing a few Clorox wipes on the ground and moping by foot. Who needs a mop when you have Clorox wipes?
We have the cleaning ladies come in and get coffee and the occasional Case Manager.
And then there was Dennis wanting to roll a fatty in the men's room. Ha ha.
I didn't see Deborah today at the cafe but I did see her walking down the road.
In all my conversations today something that George said has stuck with me all day.
I asked him what his favourite thing to cook was and he replied right away with a HUGE smile: Bread. What is t he secret to making bread? I ask him. He looks down at his hands for a fraction of a second, still smiling, and then he looks up at me again his eyes dancing and replies:
" Patience".
So maybe people and bread have something in common. Who would have thought!

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Nooma Nooma

So we have started afternoon classes with the people from the cafe.
We are going through the book Purpose Driven Life and watching a few Nooma videos( by Rob Bell).
The videos are really key for catching the attention of the group.
There are eight of us and four of us are staff. The other four of us are the most unlikely assortment of men, one of them being Dennis. For the two days we have been doing classes he has only stayed for the video. As soon as we start talking about Jesus he leaves, but he keeps coming.
Today I started realizing that people many times live out of experiential knowledge instead of logical reasoning. It doesn't matter how many times people are told the truth or if they know it in their heads. They have to believe the truth.
So, I wonder how do you help people believe the truth. How do you provide experiences for them where things turn out differently and they can see the truth?
If we can help people believe the truth in their hearts and have good experiences will they be more motivated to make wise choices and change their lives?
I don't know. I wonder...

Beating "IT"

Today I spent an hour and a half talking to a woman who is a prostitute. We sat at one of the small round tables in the cafe drinking coffee with another guy. She wears nothing but a sundress that is too short, and a fanny pack. Some how her hair is curled and she sports mascara. Her face is worn from hours of walking in the Florida Sun. Her nails are painted. The man wears jeans and a t-shirt. He is tatooed finger tip to forehead. He is missing his front two teeth and his bottom two teeth. He has green eyes and wears his sunglasses back wards when he isn't using them. Both of my friends are convicted felons.
The woman, let's call her Deborah, started the conversation asking me about my hair... The conversation then lead to the men who have "bought" her. Then we talked about her son. The 57 year old prostitute woman sitting next me to drinking coffee has a son?
Her son has also seen a few years of prison. " He can't get out of bet with out a joint and a big glass of mountain dew" she told me, "He doesn't know life beyond that".
Then she told me a story that I'll never forget.
One week from her son's release date he was out on the work crew and his supervisor called him over and told him he had a new job for him. He was told they were going to dig a grave for a homeless man that day. The bus came and then went to the field where they began to dig the grave. After the grave was dug, the body was lowered down into it, and they buried this man. The woman's son asked his supervisor "where is this guys family? Isn't any one gunna say a prayer". He had no family, no one to say a prayer. So the woman's son said a prayer for the homeless guy.
As she told me this story she began to cry. She said " I don't want my son to have to read about my death in the newspaper one day. I don't want to be some low life homeless crack person". Her mascara was running a little bit now and her tough exterior faded just a little bit.
Deborah wants to get clean and quit using. She hates the drugs and what they've done to her. "I have been able to beat so many things in my life. I used to be a lawyers wife. I was a real estate agent. I used to live in a nice house and get my nails done every week and look at me now. I'm a druggie. And I can't beat it".
I guess the question is how bad does she really want to get clean. Her pleas resonated with the cry of my own heart. I do what I do not want to do, and I don't do what I want to do.
Isn't this the struggle of all human life? Some where in all of our lives do we have one thing we do that we know we shouldn't? Just one more brownie, just one more coffee... I'll quit smoking after this stressful event in my life is over... Just one more mile.
We all have addictions. Some people's addictions put them on the street selling their body.
Today, I learned that in whatever capacity I work with people, what ever their problem may be, there is a little bit of that in my heart too. I am on the same level as they are, I need Jesus just as much as they do. It's my job to remind them that they can make the choices to go in the right direction. It's my job to tell them they are loved, that heaven is after them.

" What I'm Sayin Is"

Bob: Long gray hair even though he's partially balding.
Long beard, some times he wears a helmet , sometimes he doesn't.
His eyes are bright most days but you can tell his intelligence and presence of mind has worn down after years of combat. He says the same thing to me every day " you are sweet and lovable and you deserve to be told that every day". Good thing I have Bob to tell me.
Sometimes Bob spits when he talks, especially when he drinks coffee and it gets stuck in his beard. I have mastered the art of discreetly wiping my arms down with Clorox wipes while he is talking to me. I have learned many things from Bob I never wanted to know.
He told me all about his life before he went to Vietnam, before Agent Orange.
Bob likes to interrupt me a lot and he also talks with out stopping. He gets really close to my face and I have to back away. This is great for me to practice listening to him, and hearing what he is saying while maintaining good boundaries.
Bob has challenged me to learn how to ask good questions. I have to remember what I was talking about and be able to bring it back up in a tactful way.

Bob told me about his " little kitty" and his 2 bedroom house with wall to wall carpet. " It's a palace " he tells me. " With running water and e-lec-tricty. I even have myself a stereo! "
Bob has dementia and PTSD. His room mate Ron says sometimes he finds Bob crawling through the house at night whispering to himself.
Bob is not homeless but he comes to the shelter every day any ways.
My first thought is that he needs help, and why don't guys like him have a case manager? What about counselling... what about life abundant for Bob?
Who will help him if he can't help himself.
It makes me a little ... pissed?

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Dennis

Dennis is the tall blond guy from day one.
Dennis is the toughest case we have at the cafe. He comes in every day we are open. He reads the comics, drinks coffee and shows us what variety of drugs he has in his pocket that day.
He is addicted to Heroine and probably other things as well.
The surprising thing is that he is more educated than the majority of people in the world. He has a masters in business administration and a bachelors in economics.
He has been in the Marines...
How does a guy like this end up where he is?
Dennis calls me young one, and I call him Bearded one. He has a 4 year old beard. Its pretty sweet. He wears hiking boots every day.
I like Dennis the best because he is so anti-Jesus. Its weird, I don't know why. I think I like him because he laughs when he reads the comics and when you dig deep enough he is upset about being addicted to drugs. He doesn't pretend to like things he doesn't like... He is rude. Ha Ha!

Day Three - Drama, Jamie and Tent City

Day three and I seem to have the routine down.
Hand out snack, fill the sugar shakers, say no to drugs. Got it.
Today I saw a huge insight into the homeless world. What happens when you live with a group of people 24/7, a group of people who cannot find jobs ( for what ever reason), can not shower regularly and have various mental disabilities? DRAMA. You get heaps of drama.
Cory's devotion today was about drama and how when we live with people we get stuck in a constant world of drama and sometimes we feel like we can't escape, but we can. It all starts with what each of us individually does with out mouth and with our time.
So the police came because there was a "fight"...
And then there was Jamie. Jamie is 20 years old and has been engaged several times. she claims she is pregnant and it kinds looks like she is, but no one is really sure. It makes me so sad to see some one my age who is homeless! I keep thinking there is so much hope for her and she still has a chance. I wonder what her story is.
I also learned about Tent City today. Tent city is the City's way of dealing with the homeless population. All the homeless have been given a tent and moved to a piece of land out of sight( out of mind...). And they exists there in a community of perpetual homelessness. Now you have people who need encouragement and help from people who are not like them all living with people who are in the same situation they are... The police do not enter Tent City, so you can imagine that there are quite a few shenanagins that go down there. Drugs, Sex and Rock n' Roll etc.
I think because these people live is such a state of drama all the time it has effected their way of thinking. It's like they live in an entirely different world now that consists of what little they have, and what is going on with every one in their circle. They don't think reasonably any more.
When I left today I saw one of the most precious ladies that comes to the cafe on the side of the road. I had no idea, but I guess she went back to work. She was standing on a street corner, waiting.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Day Two - Coffee Snack and Dignity

So, the cafe is an old chapel/multipurpose room with round tables and chairs.
It is getting ready to be converted into a real cafe so it looks a little strange to the new comer,
but I don't think any one else notices.
Today, I recognized the regulars. They read the paper, play yatzee or read books while they drink their coffee. The cafe opens at 9 am and closes at 11:30. At 9:30 Cory gives a devotion.
His very clear and loud voice catches the attention of the cafe goers as he tells them each day that " we take time to pause and pray and hear from God". He tells them that we don't want to shove anything down any ones throat and that he is going to pray so if any one wants to leave that would be the opportune moment to step outside.
As Cory started to bow his head to pray I saw a tall blond, bearded guy stand up. " I am gettin' the hell out of here..." I just smiled a little bit and looked at Cory. He didn't bat an eyelash and continued on with his prayer. Bearded guy I now know as Dennis, he is another story entirely.
Today people are remembering my name which is funny.
There is not a whole lot for me to do this week because we have extra help, so today I just sat and talked with people and tried to find out more about their lives.
What I realized most is that people are people and they have feelings no matter what shape their lives are in. Homeless people hurt too. Sometimes all they need is for some one to sit and listen to their life story, how they became homeless or which scar came from what.
As I meet people my mind in curious and always inquiring about peoples life situations or state of mental health. It has only been two days and I have seen a host of mental disorders.
Dignity. This word strikes me today. These people come in to get coffee. Fair Trade, excellently brewed coffee. They read the paper and catch up on current events.
I wonder how many suited business men around America are doing the same thing...

Day One

I got out of my car and walked up to the Social Service Center of the Salvation Army. I saw a friendly face and asked where the cafe was located. I started to take notice of this man who was speaking to me. Mid 40's, weathered skin, tattoos , rolled bandanna around his
head in rock n' roll fashion. He kindly told me all about the rock concert he had been to the night before as well as pointing me towards the right direction and asking me for my number.
The beginning of a beautiful summer.
I went to the Salvation Army with one expectation, that we would be serving coffee to homeless people.
My first day was a bit awkward as I tried to figure out exactly where I fit in at the cafe.
I was assigned to hand out snack to our patrons and was informally educated on the Salvation Army and its history.

Cory and Laura: Founders of the Cafe. Cory is a preacher at heart and Laura usually hands out snack. Laura is great because she calls every one sweetie. She is amazing at keeping up with people and remembering names. Cory is great because he can talk over 30 people milling around while keeping his concentration.

John: The Coffee Guy. John keeps the coffee flowing and instructs me to wash cups or refill the sugar shakers. John is great because he is humble and he makes good coffee. John is Black and that also adds to his greatness. He "Amen"s and " Yes, Lord"s when we pray. It makes my heart glad.

The cafe is interesting to me because it is intertwining Social work and Ministry. I feel this is how the church should operate and in many places it does. So how do you do Social Work in a Christian setting among homeless people.
I guess I am going to find out.